Browsing Category: Funny

A Bit of a giggle II: Cars Verses Computers At a recent computer expo, COMDEX, Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated, “If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, and we would all be driving $25.00 cars that go 1,000, miles to the gallon. […]

A guy goes to the tattoo parlor A guy goes to the tattoo parlor and offers the tattoo artist $1, 000 to put a $100 bill on his willie. The artist agrees, but is curious and asks the man why he wants to do this. The man replies, ‘I have my reasons which I would […]

A man decided to have a face lift for his birthday A man decided to have a face lift for his birthday. He spends $5, 000 and feels really good about the result. On his way home he stops at a newsstand and buys a paper. Before leaving he says to the sales clerk, “I […]

Intelligent Quotes Question: If you could live forever, would you and why? Answer: “I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever,” — Miss Alabama in the […]

Air Traffic Control Conversations Here are some conversations that airline passengers normally will never hear. The following are accounts of actual exchanges between airline pilots and control towers around the world. ………………………… Tower: “Delta 351, you have traffic at 10 o’clock, 6 miles!” Delta 351: “Give us another hint! We have digital watches!” ………………………… Tower: […]

Falling A woman was shaking out a rug on the balcony of her 17th floor condominium when a sudden gust of wind blew her over the railing. “Damn, that was stupid, “she thought as she fell. “What a way to die.” As she passed the 14th floor, a man standing at his railing caught her […]

A man is in a hotel lobby A man is in a hotel lobby. He wants to ask the clerk a question. As he turns to go to the front desk, he accidentally bumps into a woman beside him and as he does, his elbow goes into her breast. They are both quite startled. The […]

Airplanes Verses Women Airplanes can kill you quickly; a woman takes her time. Airplanes don’t get mad if you ‘touch and go.’ Airplanes don’t object to a preflight inspection. Airplanes come with manuals to explain their operation. Airplanes can be flown any time of the month. Airplanes don’t care about how many other airplanes you […]

A couple were having financial problems A couple were having financial problems until finally they couldn’t stand it any more. The husband said to his wife that is was necessary for her to make some money through prostitution to get by. So the husband drove her to the place where she had to do the […]