Browsing Category: Funny

Yo mama’s so old, I told her to act her age and the bitch died. Yo mama’s so old, she owes Fred Flintstone a food stamp. Yo mama’s so old, she used to gang bang with the Flintstone’s. Yo mama’s so old, she drove a chariot to high school. Yo mama’s so old, she’s got […]

VAN GOGH’S LITTLE KNOWN RELATIVES The grandfather who moved to Yugoslavia — U. Gogh The brother who accidentally bleached all his clothes white — Hue Gogh The real obnoxious brother — Please Gogh The brother who ate prunes — Gotta Gogh The uncle who worked at a convenience store — Stop N. Gogh His dizzy […]

Yo mama’s so big, her belly button’s got an echo. Yo mama’s so big, she has to buy clothes by the acre. Yo mama’s so big, they had to paint a stripe down her back to see if she was walking or rolling. Yo mama’s so big, she uses a jungle gym for a walker. […]

Yo mama’s so fat, I had to take a train and two busses just to get on her good side. Yo mama’s so fat, when she hauls ass, she has to make two trips. Yo mama’s so fat, when she hauls ass, she has friends come help. Yo mama’s so fat, I’ve got to tell […]

What are Seniors Worth Remember, old folks are worth a fortune, with silver in their hair, gold in their teeth, stones in their kidneys, lead in their feet, and gas in their stomachs. I have become a little older since I saw you last, and a few changes have come into my life. Frankly I […]

Yo mama’s so ugly, well.. look at you! Yo mama’s so ugly, she looks like you. Yo mama’s so ugly, she could only be Yo mama. Yo mama’s so ugly, they filmed “Gorillas in the Mist” in her shower. Yo mama’s so ugly, they push her face into dough to make gorilla cookies. Yo mama’s […]

Why men Are Justifiably proud of themselves We know stuff about tanks A 5-day trip requires only one suitcase We can open all our own jars We can go to the bathroom without a support group We can leave a motel bed unmade We get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness Wedding plans […]

VALUE FOR MONEY The madam opened the brothel door to see a rather dignified, well-dressed good looking man in his late 40s or early 50s. “May I help you?” she asked. “I want to see Natalie,” the man replied. “Sir, Natalie is one of our most expensive ladies. Perhaps you would prefer someone else,” said […]

Letter to the Observer Sunday January 26, 2003 The Observer I’m really excited by George Bush’s latest reason for bombing Iraq: he’s running out of patience. And so am I! For some time now I’ve been really pissed off with Mr Johnson, who lives a couple of doors down the street. Well, him and Mr […]