Browsing Category: Funny

OWED TWO A SPELL CHEQUER Eye halve a spelling chequer, It came with my pea sea. It plainly marques, four my revue Miss steaks eye kin knot sea. Eye strike a key and type a word And weight four it to say. Weather eye am wrong oar write, It shows me strait a weigh. As […]

WASHINGTON STATE ATTORNEY SEASON AND BAG LIMITS Any person with a valid Washington State hunting license may harvest attorneys. Taking of attorneys with traps or deadfalls is permitted. The use of currency as bait is prohibited. Killing of attorneys with a vehicle is prohibited. If accidentally struck, remove dead attorney to roadside and proceed to […]

Murphy’s Teaching Laws The clock in the instructor’s room will be wrong. Disaster will occur when visitors are in the room. A subject interesting to the teacher will bore students. The time a teacher takes in explaining is inversely proportional to the information retained by students. A meeting’s length will be directly proportional to the […]

A couple were driving to a church to get married. On the way, they got into a car accident and died. When they arrive in heaven, they see St. Peter at the gate. They ask him if he could arrange it so they could marry in heaven. St. Peter tells them that he’ll do his […]

HOW TO MESS WITH THE IRS (Internal Revenue Service, an agency of the government to whom Americans pay taxes on their salary) Always put staples in the right hand corner. Go ahead and put a down the whole right side. The extractors who remove the mail from the envelopes have to take out any staples […]

Girlfriend 1.0 I’m currently running the latest version of GirlFriend and I’ve been having some problems lately. I’ve been running the same version of DrinkingBuddies 1.0 forever as my primary application, and all the GirlFriend releases I’ve tried have always conflicted with it. I hear that DrinkingBuddies won’t crash if GirlFriend runs an emulation program […]

Bill vs. Saddam Mark as unread Saddam Hussein and Bill Clinton meet up in Baghdad for talks onsanctions. When Bill sits down he notices Saddam’s chair has three buttons on the armrest. They begin talking but after 5 minutes Saddam presses a button and a boxing glove pops out of Clinton’s chair and bashes him […]

Clinton -vs- Titanic Similarities between the Titanic video and the Clinton grand jury testimony video: Titanic: $9.99 on the Internet Clinton: $9.99 on the Internet Titanic: over 3 hours long Clinton: over 3 hours long Titanic: The story of Jack and Rose, their forbidden love, a subsequent catastrophe Clinton: The story of Bill and Monica, […]

CONSULTANTS A timeless lesson on how consultants can make a difference for an organisation… Last week, we took some friends out to a new restaurant. After a while, we noticed that the waiter who took our order carried a spoon in his shirt pocket. It seemed a little strange, but I ignored it. However, when […]